Glasses

I know, I know – I have been ridiculously negligent of this blog lately. It’s because the girls and I have been so busy having fun! No, it’s not. It’s because preschool ended a few weeks ago, and I’ve been spending 24 hours a day with them both. I love them, and we are having lots of fun. But, by the time my usual blog-writing-time rolls around in the evening, I’m too exhausted to do anything but watch the Real Housewives embarrass themselves on Bravo TV. I will work on consistency – I promise.

Ahem. Anyways.

Paige has had her glasses for about 9 months now. Getting them was a huge day, and we’ve had lots of talks about taking care of them. (People, her glasses are MUCH more expensive than mine – like, almost-$500-expensive. Luckily they come with a year warranty. Anything that breaks or scratches, they replace, “free of charge”. We’re on our 3rd frame and 4th pair of lenses.)

As you know, her little bully sister Blair loves to torture Paige by pulling her hair, stealing and hiding her favorite toys and, most often, yanking off her glasses and tossing them.

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So, of course, it was only a matter of time until we had a break that Mommy couldn’t fix until the new pair arrived. Said break happened at approximately 4:36 pm the Friday of Memorial Day weekend. Exactly 6 minutes after her ophthalmologist’s office closed. For the next 4 days.

Did I mention that Blair actually managed to snap Paige’s glasses clean in half? Right now the middle of the nose bridge (I don’t know if that’s what it’s actually called – the little piece that holds the two eye piece-y thingies together – but it sounds super-official, so I’m going with it).

Throughout the weekend we went through various stages of attempting to fix her glasses so she could wear them. Let’s all try to keep in mind that little Paiger’s prescription is +6.50 in each eye. Um, I’m not sure if you are familiar with sight or not, but my personal prescription is -3.00 and I would not be able to safely drive without glasses or contacts. In fact, I just took my glasses off and I can hear the television, but the screen is just a blurry mess.

So, to say homegirl is pretty much blind without her glasses would be the understatement of the year. Plus, her eyes cross a little (okay, fine. A lot.) when she’s tired and not wearing her glasses. While I think it’s super-cute, I can’t imagine it’s very comfortable. Thus, the fix-it efforts began.

We tried super glue first, and who knew super glue didn’t work on plastic? Come to think of it, does super glue actually work on anything other than gluing fingers together???

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What? You can barely tell they're broken! Right? RIGHT?!?!?

What? You can barely tell they’re broken! Right? RIGHT?!?!?

The duct tape, while pretty funny, didn’t really hold up all that well. We should have known to give up at this point. I mean, isn’t the 11th Commandment “If you can’t duct it, …” Oh, well – you know.

So, we moved on. My husband came up with this fix, which I think was pretty genius. And, honestly, possibly one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a long time.

Yes. That is a shishkabob skewer. Good for grilling AND glasses. Who knew?

Yes. That is a shish kebab skewer. Good for grilling AND glasses. Who knew? I think the combo of the glasses with the missing tooth will be the new “it” look for 2014. 

This eventually failed too, and we were out of ideas. So, we did what all good parents do at this point.

We gave up.

I left a message for the ophthalmologist and heard back from them almost immediately after they opened Tuesday morning. The good news: Paige’s glasses were still covered under warranty. The bad news: they didn’t have the frames in stock and it was going to be a week before they came in.

So, poor Paige spent the next 7 days not being able to see. She was a champ. Other than standing directly in front of our bedroom TV to watch it (side note: a ‘+’ sign means farsightedness – the closer things are the more difficult they are for her to sees) you really wouldn’t even know she was having trouble. She never complained, not once. Not even of a headache (my main concern).

Post haircut, sans glasses. Okay, fine. I just wanted to use a picture showing their adorable new haircuts!

Post haircut, sans glasses. Okay, fine. I just wanted to use a picture showing their adorable new haircuts!

And then, Tuesday morning of this week, her new glasses arrived. She can see again, and all is well with the world!

New glasses that match these jammies, obv. She's showing you her new "pet turtle." Because a dog, a cat and two hermit crabs just weren't enough animal for one girl, apparently.

New glasses that match these jammies, obv. She’s showing you her new “pet turtle.” Because a dog, a cat and two hermit crabs just weren’t enough for one girl, apparently.

The only person who seems unhappy with the new glasses is Blair. But that’s probably just because she’s already been in timeout multiple times already for trying to yank them off Paige’s face.

Not on my watch, Blair. Not again, at least.

 

 

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