By now you all realize how much I dislike the morning. Or, at least a lot of hubbub in the morning. I need just a teeny bit of quiet time to get moving (and happy). And you also realize that I married a man who jumps out of bed ready to face the day. Regardless of what time it is.
By some cruel twist of genetic fate, my girls have gotten both of these traits. They are up with the roosters … and yet they are in HORRIBLE moods. Seriously. Every. Single. Day.
In fact, just this morning I said to Derrick “Just once I would love to wake up hearing cute giggling, not screaming. Perhaps it might make me in a better mood.” (His smirk and lack of comment suggested otherwise.)
Each morning Paige sits in her bed and screams “MOMMY! MOMMY! I’M AWAKE! COME GET ME! I’M HUNGRY!” Then she realizes she’s barking (or, er, screaming) up the wrong tree and the shouts change to “DAAAAADDDDDYYY! DADDY! I HEAR YOU OUT THERE! I’M HUNGRY! COME GET ME!” Which, if he has the audacity to actually finish whatever he’s doing before going in to get her, quickly becomes “I MEAN IT! GET IN HERE! RIGHT! NOW!” (See? Sounds pleasant, doesn’t it? Keep in mind this is typically around 6:15 am).
So, we came up with a plan (Derrick and I, not Paige and I). We needed for her to realize when it was okay to yell for us, and when it was too early. (Yes, as I’m typing this I see it sounds ridiculous. But trying to just teach her not to scream is a task I’m not willing to undertake. I’m not Jesus. No miracle-working here.)
We bought her a clock. A “Tot Clock,” to be specific. It plays songs when it’s time to go to sleep. The face of the clock turns a light blue for naptime, and a dark blue for bedtime. You can set a timer so it stays blue for a certain amount of time during nap. And you set a different ‘alarm’ so that when it’s time to wake up, the face of the clock turns yellow.
It’s pretty freaking cool. And it was NOT cheap.
So, obviously, problem solved, right?
Wrong. What happens now?
The screams sound like this “MOMMY! MOMMY! MY CLOCK IS STILL BLUE, MOMMY! MOMMY, WHEN WILL IT TURN YELLOW?? MOOOOMMMYYY! I THINK IT IS STILL TIME TO BE ASLEEP, RIGHT?” Then change to “DADDY! DADDY! I HEAR YOU OUT THERE! MY CLOCK IS STILL BLUE! WHEN IS IT GOING TO TURN YELLOW?” And finally, to “GUYS! I MEAN IT! THE CLOCK IS NOT GOING TO TURN YELLOW! IT IS BROKEN! IT’S … OH!!!! GUYS! THE CLOCK IS YELLOW! IT’S YELLOW!!!! IT’S MORNING! TIME TO GET UP!!!”
Every. Single. Morning.